A temptation

Washington University is advertising a job that's a lot like my old job, except with a somewhat higher salary. I'm tempted to apply. It would be comforting to slip back into a facsimile of my old job and recreate a version of my old life to the degree it's recreatable in St. Louis. I could get a car and an apartment in University City. It would get me out of this suburban hellhole. St. Louis will never be as charming and fun as New Orleans, but it's probably less susceptible to destruction. I could just forget about law school, and in a way that's tempting, too--law school's so hard and so expensive. On bad days I don't feel up to the challenge, not after having my life uprooted like this.

But of course, then I would be rooted in St. Louis, which is not where I want to be. And before too long I would probably start to feel as stagnant in that job as I did in my old one.

I think I'm going to have to buy a car and try to work more to make up the cash. I don't know about getting a car loan--I'm not sure if temporarily semi-employed refugees/full-time students can get car loans--although I understand my credit union is going to be a little bit freer with loan money when it reopens in New Orleans. I'm not sure if I could manage the payments while I'm in school--maybe if they're under $200. I guess I wouldn't have to borrow that much.

There's nothing I want more than to have my life back exactly the way it was a month ago.