Black dog, eating worms

It must be going around, because the outside news is almost all bad. Financial collapse and all its ramifications. The American fall from grace and prominence in this last administration. The ban on off-shore drilling lifted. The general dumbness of the electorate. Etc. Etc.

It was a bad time to go off the Wellbutrin. I am still unemployed and the contract work that was supposed to be my safety net is proving to be not so easy to get as was advertised. I just discovered my gas and water were cut off today. I have a pretty interesting internship at a nonprofit, but I'm getting paid about minimum wage. The Commonwealth of Virginia is facing its own budget crisis and I doubt it will be hiring me anytime soon. About three weeks till bar results come in. I don't know how I'm paying the October rent, and as of the end of this week I will be behind on several bills, thereby jeopardizing my credit and my ability to buy a house or a car even if I ever do get a job. If, a month from now, I find I didn't pass the bar and I still don't have work, I'll have to tuck tail and run back to my mom and dad. And I don't even want to think about what that will be like.

I will turn forty in less than two months. Also: nobody likes me, everybody hates me, guess I'll go eat worms.